Have you ever been really bored in life? So bored that you could sit and update a blog which you are sure that no one will ever read and you yourself would be thoroughly disinclined to read in the future?
What is with this brain of man? What is the continuous craving for new stimulus and continuous yearning for wanting something different, something new, something to learn, experience and gain an insight into?
It is in times like these that I get this really strong feeling that most of my time in life I keep myself busy to just avoid my brain asking me inconvenient questions about what I am doing with myself? What is one supposed to do with oneself anyways? To get something done, to 'achieve' something significant, there usually is a need for a consistent effort over a period of time and I just don't seem to garner the required motivation to be able to justify to myself to doing one thing over others for any reasonable amount of time. It all get down to basics - what are we here for anyways?
There I am rambling again about questions of life, universe and everything which I am supposed to have answered for myself long long time back when I was doing my Masters... but I now realize that the answers I had got for myself where more like pieces of reasoning based on a few assumptions and when those assumptions themselves are questioned, the answers just don't have the permanence.
That also makes me wonder if anyone really did get answers to the questions. When you read through the works of some popular philosophers, they seem to have arrived at answers to questions which were bothering them... but then again, these answers were based on certain assumptions of their own. Trying to get answers is itself tricky... for the question arises as to why is one seeking the answers to the first place. For me it was never about trying to reach a particular goal that I was looking for answers... it was mostly for keeping my 'brain' happy and keeping it away from gnawing my internals. Well, over the years, I have realized that whatever deductions I come up with can keep my brain happy only for a certain period of time and that this game between me and me will be a life long affair.
A lot of tangential thoughts keep coming to me at these times. Isn't it a bit sad to not have a goal? Isn't it more than a bit sad to try to get answers to questions related to purpose of life just because there is something inside you which is pestering you to get answers to those questions and not because you want to achieve something great with this knowledge?
